this

blog remains very difficult for me
addicted to my abstract thoughts
or unable to break from the need to only reveal small snippets of myself
unable to honestly reveal things


maybe cos approx two years ago i discovered a world that i never thought possible
outside of berkeley, my mind began to wrap around ideas and emotions for the first time
but that receded quickly



i am left with the inability to process, because during that time, i did not need to. and what a wonderful feeling that was.

writing in abstract allows me to write whatever the fuck i want, and you as the reader would never fully know/comprehend my emotions or thoughts at that time.

ironically i leave you hanging because i want you to come back.


now trying to process things in a non-mundane manner

so that my reader will be able to process and understand it too. and comeback.


and maybe,
finally, i will too.